i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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