I can tuck mytits in my pants
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
No subtext here. People are naked.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
