I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
