I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
