You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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