Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
