Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize