I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
