I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
