The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
