Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize