Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
