I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Randomize
