I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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