Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Randomize
