I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
