Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
