I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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