I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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