i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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