Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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