ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
