Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
