Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
