I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
