I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I am puke
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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