Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
