this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize