yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
