Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
