just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
