actually, I'm a sock model
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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