We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
i think im in europe. pls send help
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
