Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
