The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
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