you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My butt remains clenched, sir.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
