what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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