So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
