He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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