If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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