We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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