I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
