Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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