why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
