Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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