**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
