____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
