found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
