I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
