I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
