Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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